The continuation of the end...

It's not really my feel to blog right now or anytime soon but today is just some grueling day that forces me to blog. I don't blog no more mainly because there's no use in letting people know how I feel anymore. Friends are people to choose based on their own criteria. I on the other hand don't fall in much criteria. Sometimes I feel that I belong in the "dumping grounds" of an everyday life. When you are not needed, the more you'll be alone. Its so easy to be closer to someone else than to me. The jokes I crack don't seem funny no more. Hah... And yet people still ask me why am I so happy everyday... I guess living is harder than just dying... The challenge in surviving makes us who we are. But guess fantasy is much more promising now than being practical.

Very soon my mouth will be sealed and you will never hear a word from me again. Every sentence I say, every word I speak, is always interrupted by someone else. It's as if I don't play a significant role in their lives enough to be heard. And "enthusiast listening" is not listening at all... It's just listening to me for the sake of listening to me. Might as well shut myself up... Can't believe my sem's going to be a rush sem and I've not even prepared much... My "love life" is leading me in multiple directions and I'm struggling to keep myself from being controlled by it. I still hate "love" because it continuously blinds me day after day... I have a strong affinity towards Malaysians. I don't know why. I always get to know them easier than Singaporeans themselves. The ironic thing is that I'm a Singaporean too. Does being born in Malaysia have anything to do with having affinity towards Malaysians? I hope not, I hope it's just coincidental.

One more thing I've learnt... Promises are meant to be broken, so are all our hearts. If you can't handle fragile items, don't make them in the first place...

The Mixed Boy