10-film Reset Theory

Never knew I would get to tell my story on the "10-Film Theory" Haha... Sounds very dumb when I look back at myself when I told myself that it wuld never happen again but eventually it did. It feels like a slap on the face. For those not aware what "10-Film Theory" is, it is the repeating of a life-clip after 10 film slides. Picture a clip that plays something only for 10 slides, then on the 10th slide is the most interesting, most suspense moment that something crutial might happen. But on the 11th slide, it resets itself to the 1st slide. I.e. back to square one. I had a talk with one of my friends, she told me that I'm a fine guy, I shouldn't have problems communicating with people. Then why is there such an opposite result? Is she lying to me just to make me feel better? Is there a coincidence that people just didn't want to know me more? Am I projecting myself in a wrong way? Am I not bring up my image the way people expected it to be? If it's the last option then I'll gladly NOT change myself because there's no need for me to change myself just for the sake of others. Must people "grow-up"? If I just want to be alittle wild and loud, is there something wrong? Everyone has a little child in them, why do you segregate the ones projecting them aloud with the ones not at all? So many questions so little hope...

Upset and having headache
The Mixed Boy