A problem about me...Are you sure?

In sociological terms, a problem is something only related to an individual while an issue is something that is related not only to an individual but to a society. For example, if someone losses his job, it's his problem; but if more than half of a society losses their jobs, then it would be considered to be an issue.
Back to the title of having a problem about me, ya, I think there is a problem about me. If there isn't a problem about me, then why do I feel that there's a problem about me? Throughout my 10 years as a prefect and student's council and two years as a leading NS personal in my office, attended dozens of leadership courses and seminars and even meetings and conferences, I still see myself as someone not as capable as many other people who do not go through as much as me. Why?
I see many people in University having many other talents such as knowing how to play tennis or run fast or play handball like many other pros I've seen in my life. But what talent do I have? To sit around and be fat and 'display' my leadership? What leadership do I have when no one listens to me or be lead by me? I always find myself being lead and not leading. What's wrong with this picture?
it hurts me more to hear from a friend that girls like to see guys with talent... Oh By GOD, so leadership is not a talent... Oh ya it's a skill... not a talent... but that leads me to well... nothing... Don't get me wrong, I'm not desperate to have a talent just to attract girls. What I'm trying to refer to is that people only see those who have talent? Isn't there a reason why they have the talent in the first place? That people like me don't have a chance to discover this talent?
One other thing I can't stand is someone complaining about other sulking about their lives not having a companion, and saying that there's no reason for people to be in a relationship. BUT she herself is dating someone... Super hypocritical... I can't stand such people. Just adding oil to my misery as not having someone to share some quality time with me... Basket...
I received an sms from GP1 about his blog. After reading it, I kinda felt a little ashamed of myself. I remember once when I actually took someone for granted and I didn't know about it till he shouted it in front of my face. I was still in NS. I good friendship melted to a couple of strangers... As what many books have explained, everyone has a trust bank in them, when you want them to believe in you, you have to gain their trust, you have to make them deposit a trust note into their databank so that they would remember you. But when you make a mistake or take things for granted, your withdrawal will cost you much more than what you can afford. Not even trying to rectifying the problem would help you then.
Well enough of that, it feels a little better clearing that over the air... But I'm really serious about one thing... It's really hard to be me... There is seriously a very big reason for that... Believe me, there is SERIOUSLY a big reason for that...

Annoyed and upset
The Mixed Boy

It may be after the exams but it's really boring now...

I thought it would be better after the exams but now, it's almost the same... You're waiting for something to happen. Something you can't make it happen... Hahaha... It becomes so boring that I went down to Jurong Point to borrow some books from the library. Oh ya, I managed to complete Maximum Tuning 2... COOL!!! It's a racing game that is rather realistic. Yup, I kinda like racing games, there's this adredaline flowing in your blood and risks you've got to take which driving... Super cool... But it's rather expensive, so got to control those tokens rolling in... Hahaha...
Anyway, though I've some events lined up this whole week, they aren't the type of events I would want to do, except going to the chalet... I really hope I would get gold for my IPPT I need that money... I need to go get some items from Sim Lim too... Hahaha... I don't believe that I was ripped off from a games retail shop yesterday. They say the controller for PS2 is working fine but then it's kinda spoilt now... I already thrown away the receipt and packaging... SHIT!!!! WTF.... I really hate these kind of people... Hell to them.... Arhhh... Nvm... I'll just have to survive with this... It cost me 30 dollars, I've got to save money... *Sob*.....

Tired, bored but Angry
The Mixed Boy

The last stretch - Changing the landscapes of my future...

The last paper today... I REALLY FEEL SO MUCH BETTER NOW!!!! YAHOOOOOOO!!!!! Now can play and play and play and play... well you get my drift... hahaha...It's also time for me to clear up my readings and notes and compile them into my storage sections.
I really think today's paper is either to test how fast you can write or how fast you can think or whether a miracle actually would happen. I wrote a total of 8 pages for 4 out of 5 questions in 2 hours and yet there's insufficient time for me to complete the paper. WTH... It really 'changed' my 'landscape'... hahaha... I'm just hoping it's sufficient to pass the paper since I've s/u - ed it...
Anyway, I'm in the library now... To study for next sem's work.... NOT!!! Hahaha... I'm like going to play games till night man... Later should go for a run, tomorrow and sunday as well... I think I might have an IPPT on next tuesday... Arhhh... Sometimes it's strange when you already ended your exams but after which, you don't know what to do next. Hmmmm.... Oh well, just continue to play games, find a job and of course help my mom with her chores...

Happy to be Free
The Mixed Boy

Ho Bo... Your my ideal.....Not!!!!!!

Well, biodiversity is over. This is the only paper so far that is not as bad as it seems. I didn't do a mistake in the questions *YaY* but then Ho Bo came out with his famous questions again.. Never seem to know them until you get one of those thick microbiology dictionary. Hahaha... Now down to the last paper.. I'm so excited. After that it's Zero Hours till I'm sick of it. Hahaha... Now for the last 'HARD' I need to tackle. They are commanded by stealth general. Oh no... difficult difficult. Commencing deciphering tool kit...

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Tired but Excited
The Mixed Boy

The Sociology downturn...

I regretted not reading the question fully. Now I feel like I've been slapped in the face, knowing that I read the question wrongly and I interpreted it wrongly. AAAARRRRRHHHH!!!!! I don't believe this, three times in a row. I really REALLY hope biodiversity would not have the same case. PLEASE!!!! The only essay I was confident about was the gender equality question that I confidently attempted... Hmmm... But still...

Tired and MORE Tired
The Mixed Boy

I was severly wounded in the battle between me and Medalian...

Oh my GOD!!!! Today's paper was a killer, an eye opener to me on what I forgotten to read up and what I shouldn't have thought on. I made a few mistakes and I didn't know how to do four MCQs because I forgotten to read them up. AARRRRRHHHH!!!! And a 10 mark question on transcription and translation? WTH!!! There's alot to write even for prokaryotes. And I made a mistake on crossings. I was suppose to use AA x aa but I used AA x Aa. AAARRRRRHHHHH!!!! I am SOOOOOOOO dead... The last structured question was a puzzle to me. I really don't understand what it meant. But I believe the first part was 2 loci and there's epistasis involved. I didn't have enough time.. I don't have ENOUGH TIME!!! AAARRRRHHHH Why? I planned so well but yet back fired by my ownself. No time no time, I've to get back to sociology for tomorrow's paper... I really hope to get As for my biochem and genetics. Pls....

Troubled and disappointed
The Mixed Boy

First paper of the exams and I got 'swa' -ed!!!

It's been some time since I've blogged. Yup I'm having my exams now... There's so much to read up so little time and so little brain power... Hahaha... How to harnest brain power ya? It's only by practicing. But there's not past year papers to practice. OH NO!!! Oh well, what to do? Just study then.

I GOT 'SWA'-ED!!!!!!!!!!! AAAARRRRRRRHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It was repetetively told to us on some topics in Swami's lecture notes were important. And whenever he says it's important, it means it will definately come out in the exams. Haha... I also told myself that my friends from last sem has already gotten bluff by him, I'm not going to fall into his trap. Who's to know, I was pulled into the trap no matter what.
I spent like nearly two to three weeks to memorise all his info and to understand them. It was up till a point that I couldn't care less about the exams. I just wanted to end it soon. Hmmmm... I memorised the same thing day in day out, paying lesser attention to the other info (well fortunately I've read the other notes to memorise the other stuff). There are a few stuff that I expected the exam paper to show:

- pH values and how to calculate them
- Enzymic conditions, inhibitors, Machaelis-Menton graph and Hemes
- Citric acid cycle and glycolysis

Thus I focused more on these few areas. My strategy was to attempt the carbohydrate and lipid metabolism first before the rest because they require intense memorising. Might as well complete them asap. Strangely enough, when I slept at 2am and woke up at 9am, I was still very sleepy. I continued to take short naps and drowsily reading the notes. Nothing much was going in. I had a hunch something was going to happen. Everything was fine till I went to school and sat in the exam hall. The graph paper was there, sure enough, there would be graph plotting, so expectation two was fulfilled. YES!!! When the Prof asked us to check our paper for errors, I quickly flipped to the end and looked for and questions that fulfill expectation 1 and 2. None was there. Oh no!!! I was 'swa'-ed !!!! There's no metabolism questions there!!! I can't believe it. The only quesiton that was in linkage to the citric acid cycle was "What is the condition before entering TCA?" And it's an MCQ!!! ARRRHHH!!!! I felt like a sucker... Unexpectedly such a situation can happen to me too. When I noticed there's no other expectations fulfilled, I just close the paper and smile. Because there's no need to 'vomit' out the cycles. I also noticed there's no pH related questions which further demoralise me.
Only when I started doing the paper, I noticed that the structured questions were not the problem; I knew how to do the primer question because I went for Swami's "important" tutorial. It was the MCQ that really killed me. I really take my hats off to the profs, their questions were tested from the notes but only those grey areas that we would seldom take notice off. Even if you did read everything, they test on how much you understand those facts. Wonderful... *clap clap* There's nothing much I could do, just continue doing the paper then.
After the paper, I just took a ride from my og mate back to science to collect my genetics lab report. I guess there's still things to be happy about. I got A A A+ for my three reports *Thanks Sandy - my TA* I spent like so many nights deciphering her questions because she had very high expectations for us. Then I was in the mean for my Biochemistry CA2. So there's something to be a little happy about. But the joy should not be celebrated now, I still must push on. There's the Genetics, Sociology and Biodiversity paper coming up next week, consecutively. Oh no... Got to push... I hope everything would be ok... I'm very anxious. I'm already faintly praying that my Biochem would get an A or A- at least. Alright... I think I should be getting back to my genetics. It's going to be a very long weekend and week ahead. See ya...

P.S. 'Swa' means got bluffed

-=ChEeRs=-

Tired, sleepy and numb
The Mixed Boy

I hate it when..

I hate it when I talk and nobody listens to me... Everytime I try to talk about something, even if it has no relavance to the topic we're talking about, people will just engage in their own conversations. So annoying... It's like I wasn't even there at all; They only use selective listening - what is interesting to them, they will listen, if not, they'll just leave you alone...
I hate it when my TAs tell me that I did very badly for something.. I received back an e-mail from her that I did extremely bad for my CAs in Biodiversity! How can that be? When I actually had the answers infront of me too... There must be a mistake!!! But I can't argue with her. Since she already says that she doubled checked. ARRRHHH!!! Got to do better for my finals...
I hate it when I'm stuck with not knowing what I'm doing before my first paper. I'm like dazing in space everyday and not studying as much as last sem. I'm left with 4 days before my first paper and yet I"m calm and playing with lots of games everyday. WTH... I should be studying like mad and ensure myself I'll get good grades... Hmmmm... I can't measure whether I'm prepared or not because my mind wants to take the paper now, but somehow I have this gut feeling that I'm lackign in some knowledge. I just hope it's not anything about the reference books because I hate reading them too... SO THICK!!!
I hate waiting for people to give me a reply when I have already sent an sms or e-mail or even call them some time ago. It's not a matter of hours but days or even weeks we're talking here... I just can't understand why people can just blindly ignore me... Arhhh... I am SO transparent and SO annoying.... Please hate me, please ignore me.... ARRRHHH!!!! Bunch of crap people....

Annoyed and Puzzled
The Mixed Boy

Exam - The No.1 killer for students...

I've been through a week for struggling. Nothing good actually came out from this week. Such a crappy feeling. The whole week I was playing games like there's no tomorrow, always distracted from reading my notes. Then there's like a test that I have taken just now, I'll come back to that later. I gotten B for one module's essay, which I kinda think it's alright. Wednesday was the longest, most hurtful and headache week. I ended my last lecture on Biodiversity, yet not known what was going on with the module. It marked the end of the animal or plant observations and crappy tests. The rest of the day, I was stuck in the library to study my Biochemistry and Genetics. Biochemistry was terrible enough because of the numerous equations I needed to understand and memorise for the exam. That's only like 1/3 of the module. *Sigh* I restricted myself to start reading genetics @ 3pm because of the upcoming test the next day. I was feeling terrible because I really don't know what to memorise. It was like a junk of notes lying on my table and reading up on a word "Population Genetics". But the word itself is very diversed. Need to know more of the word and understand the factors that disturb or stabilizes it. I read genetics till I forgotten I had my last tutorial on the module itself. *Thanks to Sky, if it weren't for him, I would have not gone for the tutorial* I rushed down to the tutorial and listened to the last few hints to the exam. Wasn't much of a help because the Prof mentioned that he would want to see students understand the module rather than repeating what was stated in the notes. So there will be 20% worth of concept questions based on anything but within our syllabus. I nearly fainted hearing it, when we are already struggling with the present workload. What made it worse were pupils who asked specific questions on the additional notes that not many of us have touched on. Ya, most of the students, in fact they were all, foreign students asking quesitons. I'm not against anybody or anything, but when they stated asking those questions I was taken aback, knowing that there's more to what I need to read up before the upcoming test and exam. *Sigh* However, the prof gave some hints to the test which I probably should have thanked him for that. Unfortunately, his only hint or tip was "to read up your additional notes that he had uploaded" -_-||| Alrighty then, what else can I do? So I focused mostly on the additional notes for the rest of the day.
I was still at my games again... Till I returned home and looked through my Uni's e-mail and noticed that the grades for my Biodiversity CAs were out. I downloaded and looked at my results. WTH!!! I did so badly in my CAs, getting Bs and Cs and even a D for 5 tests while the rest got like As and Bs. *Sigh* It really pulled down my enthusiasm to study for the exams. Ya it's that bad... I had high expectations for this sem. Was hoping that it would be to my advantage. Oh well... The rest of the night I was so anxious and depressed that I exhaust myself to sleep.
When I woke up, I went straight to my Uni's library and studied for the test. Who's to know, I was there playing games once again. -_-||| I just don't know why am I so attached to the games... Hahaha... Anyway, @ 2pm I went for my test... The test was a pure demoraliser... 1hr 40min was completely not enough time to finish the paper. I was scribbling my scripts rather than doing them. ARRRRHHHH!!!! I really hate tests... They aren't to test how much we know rather to test how much our fear factor weighs... Hahaha... Moreover, I don't think students challenge themselves during exams. They just challenge themselves how well or how long they can with stand the nights... Hahaha... ARRRRHHHH!!!! So this week isn't my week either... I'm kinda disappointed in myself.... Don't know why I place such high expectations onto myself... Hmmm...
Today's my last day in school. I'll be isolating myself at home for the next week till my first paper... Will be ending soon.. Happy happy... I'm going to have some fun shopping and clubbing and swimming and doing lots of fun fun stuff... I don't care.. Hahaha... Alright... I gtg now... I think my friends will be going for a jog soon.. Then it'll be a game of Zero Hour before full concentration of studying.... Stay healthy and smile always...

Disappointed but keeping Spirits High
The Mixed Boy

-=WARNING=- FLU BUG ALERT!!!

-=WARNING...WARNING...WARNING...=-
Intruder alert...
Breached into society's domain...
Scanning for frequency...NOW....
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Please people... Take care... A virus is on the outbreak... My forces and I are tracking down this virus as we speak. Stay in your homes and look after the children... Drink lots of water and don't fall prey to the eyes of the deadly ....

!!!FLU VIRUS!!!

High and Alert
The Mixed Boy

Strangest day of the week... And it's only Monday...

I heard of people really anxious of the exams and want to study very hard for their papers. But... Today I've seen the migration of students from their homes to the library. OMG!!! Flocking with students. Could hardly find a place to sit and plug in my laptop. However, today I wasn't in much of a motivation either. Oh no, Mendel's peas really got me now... Hahaha...
Anyway, I REALLY had this very strange dream - I was in a game that was so real. I dreamt that I was part of this game called 'Counter-strike" by Half-life. Then the members did not really work well with me. Even stranger was that it wasn't stiff movements and all, I could move freely as if I was really in some secret mission. I had this hand to hand combat with some terrorist and somehow he managed to pin me down on the ground with my right arm wrapped across my back. He took out a knife and pointed on the left side of my neck, then he slowly poked in that knife. Eeeeeeeeewwwwwwww... That was when I woke up with my stomach feeling very quesy. But you know, I really felt something poked onto my neck. I really not sure whether my soul was really away from my body for too long or what. *Shivering* I really don't wish to have that dream anymore. I usually would continue to sleep but then after having that dream, I really couldn't get back to sleep. I woke up and prepared to go to school.
Today's practical was alright. I think the TA was really happy with our attendence and our copperation. I like her company too, Jiang Nan is her name. Hahaha.. If you have been listening too much to JJ, you'll know what I mean. Anyway, this marks the end of the last practical and another day nearer to the exams. Oh no... I really don't like the idea that my first paper is next Friday. Oh crap... Lecture with Swami was really a brain damager... He completely rushed through the last two sets of notes and if I'm not wrong, I concluded that he wanted us to memorise everything... Hahaha... OMG... I really want to paint the wall red (bang my head on the wall till my head bleeds). I could get the overall picture of the citric cycle and glycosis BUT the minor details/steps to memorise can really slaughter anyone. Oh well... That's Biochem for you... Just get it don't and over with... After next Friday, it'll be a mission to clear three consecutive papers and will require extreme concentration and discipline... God... Give me the strength to understand all I set my eyes on... Alright people I've spent too much here... Gtg... See ya... Bye...

Anxious yet Lazy
The Mixed Boy

The immense tension has arrived... Mendel, pls go home...

I really hate this kind of feeling - the feeling of waiting for something bad to happen. Maybe it's just me or I'm just complaining, but receiving whatever grades I'm having now, it's not really boosting my morale alot. HOWEVER, I'm still going to continue with what I'm doing because as long as the exams aren't over, I've still a chance at getting what I want. I just hope I will gain the serenity to be discipline for this period of time. I need that control over my body and mind.

Nothing much is going my way, I feel more exhausted than before after jogs and I always wake up late, which would disrupt my timetable. Mendel is still having tea with me, offering me with his peas. I really had enough of them. Just don't understand how come he just likes peas. Hahaha... Grow grow grow... I know that garden peas have a short life cycle and can be produced in abundance, but you can have your peas back. I'll just stick to paper instead. Oh do leave the tea behind. Nah, it's ok, you can bring back your Neurospora crassa too. They are awfully disgusting and smelly. Nope, I already have lots of E. coli in my tummy, so you can bring that home too.
Well, was just looking through some website and found some pics on Gregor Mendel. Haha... Check out the drawn out one, looks really nasty... Hmmm... I hope Mendel doesn't become like that when he comes back for visits. Hahaha...

Pictures are adapted from www.deviantart.com

I lost another part of my soul right now...

I just don't understand why my mother likes to do things that hurt me sometimes. I also don't understand why she has to say things that inflict hurt into me. She doesn't feel it because it's not she who is receiving the remarks. In fact, whether or not I am sensitive doesn't matter, it's how I accept the remark that really hurt me alot. What is so good about engine? You tell me? What is Science any lesser importance than engine? Both are as equally important and hard to excel. How can she tell me that "to try going to engine, it is harder there". WTF!!! Of course if I have no interest in engine now, I would find it hard to excel. Similar to life science, as long as I don't find an interest or just started on the course, I would definately find it hard to excel. In fact, it is harder for me for someone who hasn't taken A level Bio. It depends on the perception of the person taking the course that finds it hard or easy. I don't find either easy at all. What makes you think I never ask my TAs and profs about doubts that I need to get clear with? I'm damn pissed at remarks like this that hurt me so much. How can you always doubt/insult my intellegence telling me that I'm always not doing this stuff? In fact, if someone who I ask for assistance gives me attitude or doesn't wish to tell me the real reason to questions, why must I bother asking him/her again? Why my mom has to use the phrase "I'm your mother, I born you..." Ya I know that, how many times did you tell me that I already KNOW and MEMORISE that? The thing is that I know what you say, do you know what I'm saying? Do you know what I FEEL? Do you know that I have difficulties getting along in school because I'm me? Do you know? Do you know that I don't like telling people my problems because it doesn't help me at all telling people how I feel, I would end up talking to myself instead. Do you know that many don't provide answers to my problems but rather I'm stuck with choices that I cannot escape from? DO you know that I want to soar high but I'm having so much pain in my heart? If only my mother can read this... I wish she know much about my sensitivity after 22 years with me... I really really wish she would open her eyes and understand.... How hard is hard and how easy is easy depends on one's capabilities. I'm trying to be the best, but I'm slowing slidding down the ladder, no one's helping me......

Frustrated and Pissed
The Mixed Boy

The day that I say I can't make it...

I never knew that today would be one of the days that I really cannot make it on my own. I was literally dragging myself around the places that I thought would be interesting to me. I intended to study my genetics till evening and achieve most of the workload in school. Unfortunately, I really didn't have the drive to do so.
I woke up with a sprained neck and had my mother shouting at me instructions that I repetitively said "yes". I got annoyed when she kept on asking me the same things again and again which I've already acknowledged on. Am I that dumb? The exams are coming closer and closer, everyone is in the crutial mood, to work hard and score well. I thought I could do that too.
I came to school and thought of staying in clubroom for awhile to meet an og mate. Not long, one of my sociology lecture mates came in and surprisingly asked me about my grades for our mid-term test. I told her I got a B- and a B+, which would add up to a B. Rather lousy... and she gotten two B+. WTF... Everyone that I've asked had B+s and I only have a B. I'm damn angry with what's wrong with what I write. There's nothing wrong with my content. It's mostly on the theories that was stated on the book. Now I'm on the lower quartile range of the cohort. I'm freaking out... And you know what's the best part? She told me her TA inform everyone that people getting an overall B is in a dangerous spot. WTF... What else can my heart do? Of course it skipped a beat. My dream of pulling my cap is dragged, punched, crushed and throwed into the fire. I don't know why must I hear such remarks..
I didn't get bad marks for my genetics, I did relatively well - the mean was 58++ points and there were pupils getting as low as 2 marks. There's three who gotten 100 marks while the bell curve shifts towards the 60 - 80 mark. I gotten a 71, but it's not enough to be relatively higher than the people I think that placed lesser effort than me. I just don't know what's wrong. It really depends on the TAs that marked our papers. *Sigh* I couldn't understand where my standards lie in my course. I wanted to make a difference in my impression towards my family. I don't want them to belittle me - to see me that I am degrading my standards. I want people to know that my aims are genuine and I really trying to achieve them - to study smart and be an active person at the same time. I really hope now that my socio doesn't give me problems. I really hope I can do well for it. At least get a B+ for it. I also hoping to get A- at least for my core modules. I want to prove to my og that I can also treat them to a meal(only those in Batman OG will understand what I mean). It's both proving and self-achieving.
The last thing I would want to see now is two people that I know rather well getting close and talk to each other as if I'm not there. I really cannot hold my head up high now.. I'm just too upset to start thinking of what's going to happen next.
I'm in the library now... Hoping that the atmosphere would change my mood. But I think it wouldn't... It would probably put me into another sleep and I would miss another few hours or so. *Sigh* WHY AM I NOT DISCIPLINE ANYMORE? I want to hit myself... I want to be the guy I was back in secondary school. On the roll and always climbing the ladder, never down..

Disappointed and Sad
The Mixed Boy

10-film Reset Theory

Never knew I would get to tell my story on the "10-Film Theory" Haha... Sounds very dumb when I look back at myself when I told myself that it wuld never happen again but eventually it did. It feels like a slap on the face. For those not aware what "10-Film Theory" is, it is the repeating of a life-clip after 10 film slides. Picture a clip that plays something only for 10 slides, then on the 10th slide is the most interesting, most suspense moment that something crutial might happen. But on the 11th slide, it resets itself to the 1st slide. I.e. back to square one. I had a talk with one of my friends, she told me that I'm a fine guy, I shouldn't have problems communicating with people. Then why is there such an opposite result? Is she lying to me just to make me feel better? Is there a coincidence that people just didn't want to know me more? Am I projecting myself in a wrong way? Am I not bring up my image the way people expected it to be? If it's the last option then I'll gladly NOT change myself because there's no need for me to change myself just for the sake of others. Must people "grow-up"? If I just want to be alittle wild and loud, is there something wrong? Everyone has a little child in them, why do you segregate the ones projecting them aloud with the ones not at all? So many questions so little hope...

Upset and having headache
The Mixed Boy

=-Wish list for this sem=-

My Wish list
1. To get at least one A- and above for my exams
2. To achieve and park at 2nd upper.
3. To be an above the average Infantry General player
4. To get lots of money
5. To complete my first wave of reservist
6. To make SCAMP a roaring success
7. To make my heavenly SOW 06 an even MORE ROARING SUCCESS!!! ROOOOOOAAARRRRR!!!
8. To play games/watch comedies/talk to friends/go for outings as much as I can
9. Last but not least, be able to hold someone in my arms and tell her I love her

Wishful and Lonely
The Mixed Boy

Wonderful... Just wonderful *clapping"

"Life is like riding a bicycle, to keep your balance you must keep moving"
Adapted from "Natty's blog"

This quote is one of the most meaningful quotes that I've ever come across. Hey do you think it's nice? Ok, let me share with you what I think of this quote(Attention: It's how I think of it, doesn't necessarily mean I'm right).

"Life is life riding a bicycle" When was the last time you rode a bicycle? Moreover, how was your first time riding a bicycle? Hard? Difficult? You've got to continously try again and again till you get it right right? That's how we try out on life. We try and try again till we get it right.

"to keep your balance you must keep moving" A wheel will continously spin as long as you keep on paddelling. But the wheel is like your life, it will rotate and sometimes meet the same problems over and over again. Your paddle is your energy/motivational esteem; as long as you continue to paddle, you're giong to be fine, because you'll be completing the cycle and returning to the happy side; But if you stop halfway, you'll tend to stay at a position for the rest of your "life". The only way to spin the wheel is to push yourself forward and paddle again. If you need someone to give you that starting push, friends are there to help. But eventually, you'll be paddling, how much you paddle determines how far you go.

I'll leave you all with yet another quote,

"Nobody's perfect......I'm nobody..."

Errrrrrr..... Good night people...

Tired and mental blocked
The Mixed Boy

Why? Why is there so much sorrow?

I'm just wondering... wondering why so many people around me are feeling sad. I mean, everyone has their sad side and can get very emotional. I understand there's a point when you don't even want to talk about it. but problems are meant to survive or exist in this world. Without it, the world will be just one mundane clip. Problems come from every aspect of life, be it a challenge or a task or by life chances, etc. You can't control these problems most of the time BUT you can do damage control OR try to see things in a different way. What I understand in sociology is that problems are like deviance - you need them to exist in order for you to differentiate what is good and bad, or what can be done and what cannot be done; Problems are tasks that indicate what we should do or not do, how to react or how to deal with it. Only then we can improve and be a better person. Nobody is born with everything. Even the wisest King has his bad times, so does Ghandi. But how do they tackle this problem? They will be sad, for awhile, before standing up, brush their sleeves and tell themselves, "Glad that is over". I know it's easier said than done, but if you haven't tried it, you'll never know. In fact, if it's not worth your worries, don't worry about it. If it's important, the problem will bounce back again and again, which will signal you that it's damn important. I, too, have problems. I want them to go away or in fact improve through my 9 months stint in university, but they just keep repeating themselves. You've got to pull yourself together. I can't afford to continue being sad, if I do, I'll just place more social pressure onto myself. I'm not saying you should forget about your problems, rather you should learn from it. Know what is the root of the problem then remember deep inside, what you should do the next time you face such incidence. Advice others when you see that they may come across the same problem. Knowledge is meant to be shared, not kept within. Only keeping it to yourself displays your selfish side. Now you know why they say that "It's better to give than to take". Well, actually I'm not really sure about that... Hahahaha... But then I would like to remind everyone that learning from a problem, mistake, situation, etc. can be a good thing, over-generalising or segregation of people is still based on your character. This I can't stop you from doing. Believe what you want and do what you want. I believe people will either respect or frown on it if they find it good or otherwise.
Last but not least, if you face a problem that is too hard to focus on, push that "little pause button" on your forehead, take a step back and breathe in deeply three times. Look afar or into the sky, then come back to reality and focus at the problem slowly at specific points. Never lose yourself or your patience when you THINK it's too hard to handle. Never misunderstand people's intended words as well, i.e. do not guess-fit words of others based on what they say.

E.g. What I say to friends - If I was in school, I would go for a jog.
What people might interpret - If he's in school he'll jog, does it mean that if he's not going to school tomorrow he might jog now?

It may give people the wrong impression. Ok, I just hope that everyone would cool down, take some time off before moving on again. Don't be sad always, it's not a good sight. So big yet act like children. Hahaha... With this, I'll leave you all another quote:

"Life's like that, live with it"

Tired and Snoring
The Mixed Boy